The Key To Jealousy By Kate Caddle When we compare ourselves to others, the issue isn’t in noticing the difference between the other person, and ourselves. We hit discomfort because we give away our power. And when we give away our power, we lose connection to...
By Samareh Rahnavardi
When I was a little girl I use to be obsessed with a brand of a chewing gum called “Love is…”
It was written exactly as I said, Love is and three dots. Every time you would buy a gum you would get a new message of what love is and I would keep them all and I created a little book where I kept all my “love is…” messages. I was fascinated with all those writing about what love would be and the pictures on it. I would be such a good girl so I could every day ask my grandmother or mom for a reward and I wanted a “Love is…” gum. Only if you saw that little face of mine with the biggest smile when I would get my gum you would know how truly excited and happy I was to read my message of the day, of what love is!
If you do a little research on google and just search for “Love is…” chewing gum it will actually pop up and you’ll see what I mean and why I would get so excited and I wanted to have them all.
But what is love?
The messages would be something like:
Love is… When you are somebody’s valentine.
Love is… When you watch TV together.
Love is… Heartbreaking without that special person.
Love is… Lending him/her the money that you know will never return.
Love is… Not trying to impose your ideas to others.
And so much more …..
And I think it was from that simple idea of someone making chewing gums with messages of love that I got so inspired to learn more and more about what love really truly is?
I kept saving all the messages I use to get and read them for my friends and taught them what it is trying to say. I would get so deep with the idea and the meaning of it all that I would lose interest in the actual chewing gum, yet all they would want to grab would be the gum. Since a child, I was amazed by the wisdom of love and I had an intense feeling of understanding the truth of love with wisdom.
I very soon understood what love really truly was and I am for sure here to tell you that the real love which is true unconditional love has nothing to do with the romantic love that we all seek or feel deprived of. I don’t have anything against romance please don’t take it wrong, I do times to time miss a moment of romantic interaction or a romantic gesture, it is all beautiful, but the truth is that love is what really truly means has nothing to do with the word romance, yet romantic love can be one of the different kinds of love, which to be honest is a selfish one too, I am winking and smiling. Have you notice when you just get involved with someone and you have a romantic relationship, you kind of deep down want to keep that person all for and to yourself, you may feel a little jealous when he/she spends time with some other friends more than you, even if you hide it with a big smile, or if you won’t get involved in some gathering you may get so hurt thinking oh why he/she didn’t take me with and so much more.
Yes, that is what I’m trying to explain, that romantic love can be selfish at times, but yet it is a beautiful and very exciting time of a relationship. Yet love is something so much deeper and so much more profound than all those.
True love is unconditional and is selfless and understanding, it is kind and it’s patient, and we all are guilty of failing at it over and over again.
The truth is that romance has been planted in our psyches as a model of love, and I believe that needs to be undone. What we consider romantic love is a breeding ground for addicted, craving, grasping feelings and behaviours that cause more pain in the world than almost anything else. Yet we all still crave it and at some point experience it. Everyone wants that feeling of belonging and feeling of being a part of a little family or commitment, but believe it or not funny enough those that don’t have it seek it and those that have it want to somehow get away from it. Well, welcome to being a human being.
Love comes differently. Sometimes in the form of one and sometimes in the form of many.
But unfortunately, when we set our focus on finding the one, we lack the recognition of that love that comes in the form of many.
So with all said I am now going to leave you with three elements of true love and I leave you with your beautiful thoughts to see what you would love to choose as experiences of love, and in your beautiful world I leave you to think it, desire it, claim it and bring it to reality and live it. But remember that love is rather to be given that received. Once you give and express it freely and genuinely, you will get it tenfold back, and that fact is the beautiful truth, my friend.
Three elements of true love are:
May you give it, share it, receive it, express it, demonstrate it and become it!